November 2010
4 posts
Clients From Hell: Client: ”The site looks... →
clientsfromhell:
Client: ”The site looks terrible. The columns don’t line up, and the text is all over the place. I’m seriously concerned. We had an agreement and I will not pay your invoice until you resolve these issues. “
Me: ”The site looks fine to me in Chrome, IE, Firefox and Safari. Which browser are you…
October 2010
1 post
“I’m not afraid of heights, I’m afraid of falling. I’m not...”
– Anonymous
September 2010
2 posts
Women's English vs Men's English
Women’s English: Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry We need = I want It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later We need to talk = I need to complain Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron! You’re so manly = You...
August 2010
6 posts
“SEX is not the answer. SEX is the question and YES is the answer!!”
– Anonymous
useless random things
random things that are useless *Ducks quacks don’t echo. No one knows why. *Hitler’s mother thought about having an abortion, but was talked out of it by her doctor. *We shed 40 pounds of skin in a lifetime. *Like fingerprints, everyones tongueprint is different. *Right handed people live on average 9 years longer than left handed people *A person uses approximately fifty-seven sheets...
elephant and camel
So… the elephant says to the camel “why do you have 2 boobs on your back?” the camel replies “that’s a pretty stupid question coming from someone who has a dick on his face”
“there’s hope between truth and fiction.”
– @knotr
July 2010
5 posts
Love is...
*What Does Love Mean?* A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, “What does love mean?” The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think: “When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all even when his...
“It’s amazing how someone can break your heart, but you still love them...”
– unknown
“Should I smile because we are friends? Or cry because we’ll never be...”
– Ian
“People have the right to be stupid. Some people abuse that privilege.”
– Unknown
“Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become...”
– Frank Outlaw
April 2010
1 post
“Aku tak menangis karena aku tak mencintai, aku membenci karena aku mengasihi”
March 2010
1 post
WHO's GUILTY?
Husband & Wife are sleeping.
Wife dreamin at nite suddenly shouts “Quick my husband is back”.
Husband gets up & jumps out of the window!
January 2010
1 post
December 2009
21 posts
The 14 Worst Words For A Designer To Hear
clientsfromhell:
“I’m not sure what I want, but I’ll know it when I see it.”
clientsfromhell:
Client: sdfpiuaooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu””””’[]
Me: What the fuck?
Client: Sorry, my cat got onto the key-board
ROLFMAO
clientsfromhell:
Client: “You’re fired.”
Me: “Why?”
Client: “You printed it upside-down.”
Me: “You’re holding the board upside-down.”
“I prefer that you create all the designs in Microsoft Word as this is a much...”
– (via clientsfromhell)
justbesplendid:
WHAT IS LIFE?
Life is an Adventure … Dare it Life is a Beauty … Praise it Life is a Challenge … Meet it Life is a Duty … Perform it Life is a Love … Enjoy it Life is a Tragedy … Face it Life is a Struggle … Fight it Life is a Promise … Fulfill it Life is a Game … Play it Life is a Gift … Accept it Life is a Journey … Complete it Life is a Mystery … Unfold it Life is...
clientsfromhell:
Client: Can you un-blur the background on this photo?
Me: Unblur?
Client: Yeah, I want the whole image to be super sharp. I don’t particularly care for that whole deep field thing you keep telling me about.
Me: You mean depth of field?
Client: Yeah, whatever. Just unblur it.
Me: That’s impossible.
Client: I’ve seen it done on CSI.
ahh thats sucks!
Joke of the Day
somethingintellectual:
An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.
His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Vincent, I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato...
“Don’t be dismayed by good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can...”
– Richard Bach
November 2009
7 posts
“We don’t like the font in the logo - could you use the one Microsoft use in...”
– (via clientsfromhell)
Me: I'm on the press check for the brochure, anything I should look out for?
Client: Can you make the blue match the color of the sky right now?
clientsfromhell:
We were contracting out some work for an iPhone application and after a week of no contact with the developer this was the response I received:
Me:
xxx,
You’ve been MIA for over a week now, please give me a call once you receive this.
Him: (Seriously, this was his actual response)
Hey - I’ve been trying to reach you for a while but didn’t know your email. My MacBook Pro...
“Well, I have worked with a lot of designers in my day and I am of the opinion...”
– (via clientsfromhell)
Client: I want a proposal for this great idea I have.
Us: Whats the idea?
Client: I cant tell you because it's confidential.
Us: How can we provide a quote when we have no details?
Client: You can sign an agreement saying that you wont work on a similar project for 2 years.
Us: How can we sign an agreement for an idea we have no information on?
Client: You will make millions...
Client: Can you show me some shades of blue?
Me: (Opens up Photoshop, Pulls up the color picker)
Client: Nope! Can't see the one I want.
Me: But... It contains ALL of the possible colors...
Client: No, no, no. The one I want is not there.
October 2009
40 posts
